And The Band Played On

I don’t know if it’s true or not….

The story that the band aboard the S. S. Titanic continued to play as the great, doomed ship was going down.

That’s kind of the way I’ve been with my weight loss struggles.

Understanding that there was a problem.

Knowing that I was sinking.

Thinking I could do nothing to change it.

Might as well play on.

Play on… because in the face of certain disaster, there is cold comfort in something that puts a smile on your face, even if it’s only for a minute or two.

Play on… because sometimes anything more than instant gratification doesn’t seem like it’s worth the effort.

Play on…

Or not.

I can see the iceberg coming on the distant horizon.

There’s time to save myself if I can just get up and get going.

There’s a lifeboat with my name on it.

Get in and start rowing. 

“Sometimes, though, you make a pact with yourself. I'll pretend there's nothing wrong if you pretend there's nothing wrong. It's called denial, and it's one of the strongest pacts in the world. Just ask all those people who were still drinking champagne while the Titanic went down.”

–Neal Shusterman, Dread Locks

Castaway

For me, trying to lose weight is like the scene from the movie Castaway where a scraggly Tom Hanks finally attempts to make his way off his deserted island.

In his rickety raft, Hanks (and Wilson… don’t forget Wilson!), fight through the crashing waves, trying to break through to the open sea.

That’s what this feels like to me, this first week back on track.

Waves crashing on my head.

Trying to push me back to where I started.

Trying to keep me stranded.

I’m fighting the waves of apathy and temptation, of inertia and instant gratification, trying to break free into the long and less exciting part of this journey.

Hey, Tom Hanks made it.

I will, too.

“I gotta keep breathing. Because tomorrow 

the sun will rise. Who knows what the tide could bring.”

-Tom Hanks in Castaway

Wednesday: Might As Well Weigh In

This week: 260 lbs

How far to go 'til dry land: 50 lbs

I know this sounds like a story, but it’s absolutely true….

My grandfather taught my dad how to swim by grabbing him under the arms and unceremoniously chunking him into a lake.

SPLASH!

And then…

Well…

Sink or swim.

He swam (though to be honest, swimming was never his favorite activity after that).

So...

Getting thrown right in...

A good idea?

Debatable.

Effective?

Well, I suppose…

I stepped on the scale this morning for the first time in quite a while and saw a number that didn’t sit too well with me.

I need to make some changes.

I need to do better.

Time to sink or swim.

SPLASH

"What do you first do when you learn to swim? You make mistakes, do you not? And what happens? You make other mistakes, and when you have made all the mistakes you possibly can without drowning – and some of them many times over – what do you find? That you can swim? Well, life is just the same as learning to swim. Do not be afraid of making mistakes, for there is no other way of learning how to live!"

–Alfred Adler

Call me Ishmael

No… call me Mo.

Big Mo.

My story… 

Well… my story is as old as the sea.

I went overboard… during meals and with snacking.

I went overboard… at parties and after-work get-togethers.

I went overboard… thinking “Where’s the harm?” or “Why not do what I want?”

I went overboard, thinking that I could always swim back to safety.

Now I feel like I’m drowning and I don’t know if I can make it back.

But I’m going to try.

"If you want to build a ship, don't drum up

people to collect wood and don't assign them 

tasks and work, but rather teach them to long

for the endless immensity of the sea."

–Antoine de Saint-Exupery